I am a divorced father of 4 children. I’m a post-Mormon. I am a gay man. This blog is my “primal scream” as I watch my children become indoctrinated with thought-terminating experiences and mind-lulling pressure. This is about how my rowboat of reason doesn’t stand a chance against the religious battleship of feelings and emotion in their daily lives.
How do you stand by and watch delusion take hold? Intervention seems to just push them farther into the hypnotic embrace of their mother’s religion.
I’ve determined that I can’t resist it by pushing back. Like with the martial art of Judo, sometimes giving in to the aggressive advance of an opponent will throw him off balance.
I will love my kids unconditionally. Mormon or not Mormon. And I’m not going to put them in the middle of the battle between their Mom’s religious fanaticism and my skepticism and humanism.
But this is a place for me to work off steam and frustration..offline so to speak. Away from the family. Away from those involved.
I see you like humor. I wrote a novel that might amuse you.
http://www.jaronbs.com/elder-wonder-comes-of-age%20jaronbs.pdf
cheers,
jaron
Thanks Jaron!… For stopping by and for the link to your novel. I’ll definitely check it out
Way to go.
I used to be mormon for 25 years, not anymore. I attend bahai meetings and I feel pretty comfortable with it.
Greetings from Belgium.
Thanks. I’ve read your blog too and I’m glad you’re free of the church too. I know very little about Bahai but I am glad you are where you are accepted and can do good.
What a poignant story! I think I’ll bookmark you.
By the way, you have a very interesting style of writing.
Thanks for the kind words Paul. If you don’t mid, I’ll subscribe to your blog as well.
I’d be honored! I hope that if I ever am in a similar situation as you with an ex-wife and kids I will have the decency and strength to handle it as you have.
I have seen you ‘around’, but this is the first time I’ve ever visited your blog. Wow. That’s all I can say. You sure have been through the ringer. I look forward to reading more.
Thanks for reading and commenting. I hope you come back
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I am a Mormon, and I try and demonstrate the same respect and tolerance that I expect from others. While I may have a different perspective, I found yours very interesting and intelligent. It always fascinates me how different people can process the same information and interpret it so differently. Your blog did not read like the typical bitter ex-Mormon – it came across as fair and sincere. If our paths have crossed, and I have ever caused you harm. I offer my my apology. I believe that most people are doing the best they know how – and simply making mistakes along the way. Some are just slow learners.
Thank you for stopping by my blog and commenting honestly! I can most certainly say that you have never offending me personally. Very few Mormons have to be quite honest. I do find the doctrine and culture offensive on a grander scale, but I can’t think of a time an individual Mormon has ever offended me on a personal level. It’s often a misconception that those of us who leave have been offended in some way and it’s simply not true. I believe at all levels of Mormon hierarchy people are “doing the best they know how.” My only criticism would be that there’s really not much effort put into learning a better way. When you’ve decidedly got the truth, you tend not to explore much after that. Once when somone asked how I came to learn what I did that caused me to leave the LDS Church my response was, “line upon line.” I wish you the best and hope you come back and comment again.
“there’s really not much effort put into learning a better way.”
You’ve pretty well summed it up. You are right–the saddest thing about the certitude of having all the truth is that it prevents further search for light and knowledge and allows members to settle for mediocrity in so many areas.
I was looking for an email to contact you directly with my fanboy-isms, so I’ll keep the following to a minimum. This blog is in my top 5 ExMo/Gay Mormon blogs at the moment. It’s positively insightful and consistently personal, never falling into a rut.
That’s so nice of you to say! It made my day. Please feel free to contact me at dadsprimalscream@gmail.com
stumbled upon your blog today and while i’m not morman and was raised baptist i can somehow relate to a tiny bit of it. my father, whom i have nothing to do with now raised us that if we weren’t in church and doing all for God then any sickness, bad grades, accidents, evil things that happened to us were punishment from God for not doing and living right. He would actually ground us for getting sick as children because he just knew we obviouly had done something wrong. I hated God for along time and as I had children I slowly started to embrace spirituality again. I made a big mistake by getting back together with my father and it almost caused a nervous breakdown. I may not have gone through as much as some but I went through enough for me. I look forward to reading more of your blog.
Thanks for stopping by and commenting. It does sound like there were a lot of similarities. As far as Mormon parents go, I had pretty flexible ones. My Mom was a bit fanatic but I’ve seen much worse. Once she passed away I think I felt more free to be myself…to think for myself. It would have been much more challenging to confront in person like you had to.
I’m gay, divorced with three children and embarking on a venture in post Mormonism. I hope to learn a bit at the well of your blog.
Scooter – Thanks for commenting. Sounds like we have a lot in common. E-mail if you ever want to talk.
dadsprimalscream@gmail.com
I am a straight, married father of 3(soon to be four) served an honorable mission and grew up in and still active in the church. I stumbled on to your blog researching my “porn addiction”. I book marked it because it gives me a better understanding of the struggles we all face. I believe you are doing a great thing here.
MR.
Thank you so much for your comment. I wish you the best as you become a father of four. I hope you are being kind to yourself and keeping it all in perspective! All the best to you.
I found your blog while stealing a pic from one of your entries…after posting it to my blog I came bag and actually read your post and found it was similar to mine. You’re blog is very encouraging to read as I go through the same…
“Mostly a lie” – please do point out specifics rather than drop by to leave histrionic accusations. I have a feeling you’ve known all about a “hypnotic embrace” for around 13 years.